Empire at War
Dice Based Pseudonyms
One of the best parts of getting a new set is opening boxes of new cards. I however also get the awesome addition of having my significant other make up some of the most hilarious names for cards based on their dice. Today I would like to share some of the alternative names she came up with from Empire at War in no particular order. My SO has seen the Star Wars movies but doesn’t know the universe as well as I do, and to me that makes this so fun. I hope you have as much fun reading them and figuring them out as I did listening to them!
Blue Inspector Gadget – Cad Bane
Go, Go Gadget Bounty Hunter.
Black Power Fist – Temptation
The dark side has its benefits… and cake I hear!
Bobsled with Guns – T-47 Airspeeder
(Insert Cool Runnings joke here)
Pretty Lady with Horns – Jedi Instructor
And she is a nice lady to boot!
Reaper – Servant of the Dark Side
Yes, this is a reference to Overwatch. Fanservice provided.
That Fucking Bug Guy From the Movie Nobody Likes – Tough Haggler.
This one made me laugh a lot as it took me a few seconds to figure out what movie (and even if it was a Star Wars movie) she was talking about. When I realized it was Watto from The Phantom Menace, I laughed harder.
Perpetually Shocked-Bot – Magnaguard
This one really makes sense when you look at the die. It looks like the Magnaguard is like surprised about everything you roll!
Treasure Gun – Psychometry
If Rey were Indiana Jones, would Finn be Sala?
Zippy Jet – Z-95 Headhunter
Chewie’s Cousin – Wookie Warrior
A bit of Speciesism but they do look similar.
Poker Pistol, A pistol that was won in a game of poker – X-8 Night Sniper
This one even got its own subtitle!
Jowels McJowelsington -Gamorrean Guard
Lil green piggies!
Tired Cop – Extortion
He has had a hard day of being a cop on a cop planet full of cops…
Trump Hand, now with more toupee – Energy Slingshot
When you see it…
Space Quaffle – Training Remote
Galactic Quidditch Joke #1
Energy Snitch – EMP Grenade
Galactic Quidditch Joke #2
That is all for today but there are more! Keep an eye out for more in a later article! Do you have any alternative names you call cards? Did any of these make you laugh? Let us know in the comments. Time to jump.
-Kyle (and Amy)